Nine Politically Incorrect Questions

1. Does it bother you when certain simulcast hosts start every other sentence with “To be honest” or “To tell you the truth?” Maybe they should just open the show by putting their right hand in the air and the left on the Bible and get it out of the way.

2. Am I the only one who went to “12 Years A Slave” thinking it was based on Todd Pletcher’s apprenticeship at the Lukas barn?

3. If Jenine Edwards had used the above line at the Eclipse Awards (it was sent to her) do you think it would it have offended both African Americans in the audience?

4. Prior to putting in the $15 million worth of improvements at Santa Anita last year, how many people left the track saying, “I’m not coming back, it’s just not nice enough”?

5. Is horse racing as homophobic as football, baseball and basketball in terms of a jockey coming out and losing business as a result?

6. How many of you already miss that famous endless row of urinals in the Hollywood Park grandstand?

7. If the current drought conditions continue in Southern California, what is the turf course at Santa Anita going to look like in June?

8. Would horse racing benefit by some trash talk in terms of stirring fan interest like the kind of smackdown Hollendorfer assistant Dan Ward put on Baffert trainee Midnight Hawk following his win in the Sham Stakes? In case you missed it, “I didn’t see anything in the Sham that scared me, even a little bit. The last eighth, that horse was lookin’ for a bleeping taxi to get him home. He went in 13 and one (fifth). You could have timed him with a sun dial.”

9. Let’s finish with a multiple choice question: What is the most satisfying for a horseplayer? (a) betting a nice-priced winner (b) getting shut out on a loser (c) having your horse put up on a questionable disqualification (d) sitting on the toilet with the next day’s Racing Form handicapping the card. Definitely (d) for us.

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ratzkym@yahoo.com @TashmanMortyS